


A Perfect Mess

by VampireVengence



Category: All Time Low (Band), Glitter & Crimson - All Time Low (Song)
Genre: Alex Is Re-learning The World, Alternate Universe - College/University, Boys In Love, Boys Kissing, College, Declarations Of Love, Falling In Love, First Love, First Time, Fresh Start, Friends to Lovers, Gay, Gay Male Character, Gay Sex, Glitter And Crimson, Homophobia, Homophobic Upbringing, Implied Sexual Content, Jack Has The Patience Of A Saint, Jalex - Freeform, Kissing, Los Angeles, Loss of Virginity, Love Confessions, M/M, Small Towns, Taking Control Of Fear, The band is still a thing, not much dialogue
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-16
Updated: 2020-06-16
Packaged: 2021-03-04 05:20:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,226
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24608353
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VampireVengence/pseuds/VampireVengence
Summary: Alex discovers that the world is a far better place than the town he grew up in and it's okay for him to be himself.
Relationships: Jack Barakat/Alex Gaskarth
Kudos: 6





	A Perfect Mess

Coming from a small town can have its perks; community spirit, being friends with basically everyone your age, low crime rates, but it also can have its downsides; closed-mindedness, ignorance, hatred of anyone who was different. It was the latter that was such a big part of why Alex decided to move to the other side of the country to go to college. He'd never fit in and he'd never been able to be himself. No one would miss him, no matter what his mother said, and he had always wanted more from life anyway.

LA was everything he'd ever dreamed of and more. It was freedom, it was equality and rights for all, it was welcoming and exciting and fast times and fun. It was everything he'd never had and Alex had never felt so at home. He made real friends and they lived together and had more fun in one day than Alex had had in the eighteen years prior. It was almost like he could forget Towson even existed.

Some things couldn't be shaken so easily though. The first time he'd seen a gay couple kissing he'd choked on his coffee and been unable to stop himself watching them. He hadn't meant to act so weird but he'd never seen it before, he could practically hear his mothers horrified shrieks in the back of his head. _There's a special place in hell for people who engage in such unnatural practises. Disgusting!_

Alex had never believed in heaven or hell but that didn't mean he wasn't utterly terrified. The town had suspected an older guy who'd lived alone at the edge of the town of being gay and a group of the men had gotten together and beaten him to within an inch of his life. Alex did not want that to be his fate.

He'd always been pretty content on his own, he didn't need to be in a relationship with anyone to be happy. He'd just figured he'd spend his life surrounded by close friends and be a cool uncle or something. Then he met Jack and everything changed.

Jack was a friend of Rian's, he'd shown up at the house to audition for the band and had swept Alex off his feet in the process. He had a childish sense of humour but an excellent taste in music, he was a dork but outgoing and didn't give a damn what anyone thought of him. He was kinda cute and a huge flirt and Alex's stomach had been tied up in so many knots he'd been paranoid he was going to throw up the entire practice. He hadn't been able to stop thinking about him after that and had had several panic attacks thinking about all the time they'd be spending together once he'd officially joined the band. He was fucked.

He'd almost said no when Jack had asked him on a date, mind instantly reeling off a long list of things that could go wrong. He'd already become pretty dependent on Jack in the few months they'd been friends and bandmates and the last thing he wanted was to lose him. The nervous excitement on Jack's face had melted Alex's heart and brain long enough for him to just go with it, as long as they took things slow.

Jack deserved some kind of meddle for his patients. It took Alex almost three months before he was comfortable enough to hold Jack's hand in public and the first time Jack had kissed him he'd nearly had a panic attack. He got there though, it got a lot easier once he realised that people genuinely didn't give a shit and were not going to attack them in the street. His mother's disapproving, insulting monologue slowly grew quieter and quieter until it completely disappeared. Jack made Alex happy and anyone who thought that was wrong could go fuck themselves.

Alex had told Jack about how he'd grown up. It had been late and he hadn't been able to sleep. Jack had just smiled and told him he got it, he was the only openly gay person in his town and he'd been ridiculed daily. Alex had been shocked but also proud, he was so brave. 

Alex had taken comfort in his strength and it had been that night that he'd made a vow to live for himself and no one else. His life always felt so temporary, so why shouldn't he enjoy it whilst it lasted?

It was their one year anniversary and they'd ended up playing a show rather than celebrating. They'd been getting a lot more shows recently and they were loving every second of it, but Alex still wanted to mark the occasion with something special.

It wasn't until they got back to Jack's that the nerves kicked in but what surprised Alex more was how nervous Jack was. They hadn't outright spoken about taking things further but Alex had made it pretty clear what he wanted.

He leant in and captured Jack's lips, arms looping around his waist as they stood at the foot of the bed trembling slightly. Jack's hands came up and gently held Alex's head, pulling him in a little closer as their lips moved together in a sultry dance.

Jack pulled back, hands still cupping Alex's face as he swallowed audibly. The tension between the two was so thick you could cut it with a knife as they both continued to gaze at each other longingly. Alex adored the skunk haired lad with every fibre of his being and at that moment, in Jack's eyes, he could see he felt it too.

"I've never done this before," Alex whispered, frightened of breaking the spell. Jack gave him a small smile.  
"Neither have I." He gave a single nod and reconnected their lips, allowing Jack to gently push him down onto the bed.

What followed was one of the most magical moments of Alex's life. They took it slow and made sure to keep checking in with each other as they experienced each other's bodies for the first time. Alex was expecting it to hurt a lot more than it did and he wasn't prepared for the intensity of the new level of intimacy. It was a little overwhelming.

"Jack I love you," Alex whispered as they lay curled up together in the quiet aftermath. Jack smiled softly into the back of Alex's neck as he held him tighter. "I love you too." Alex felt his heart soar as he gently rolled over to face him. How could something that felt so good be as wrong as everyone had always said it was?

At that moment all the fear Alex had ever felt disappeared. He loved Jack and he was happy with Jack and that was what counted. He wasn't going to let a bunch of small-minded, assholes who he'd left behind almost two years ago continue to control him and his decisions any more.

He leant in and kissed Jack hard, he'd already missed out on so many moments and held back from so many things. Not any more.

"What was that for?" Jack chuckled softly when Alex pulled away. He shrugged.  
"I just wanted to." Though clearly surprised Jack simply smiled, running a hand gently through Alex's hair. He could get used to this. 


End file.
